TITLE:The Five Biggest Regrets of The Dying
Have you all ever thought what will your regrets be when you knew you are going to die soon? I believe it is something none of us want to ponder when we are on deathbed. Bronnie Ware, a nurse who cared for the terminally ill for years had spent some incredibly special times with them for the last three to twelve weeks of life. She kept notes on the regrets mentioned by all those patients when asked on the regrets they had or anything that they would do differently, as a result, there are repetitive answers that arised again and again given by the elderly. She summarized it into the top 5 most common regrets of the dying.
Here's the list:
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.
By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.
We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
Often they would not truly realise the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.
It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.
When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.
Quoted from the book: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying - A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing by Bronnie Ware .
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After reading this article, I realized all those regrets are not the regret of the dying but its the regrets of those who are living. All these regrets just never crossed our mind as we still always have the thought "we're still young, we're still far from the death". Its unsurprisingly all those regrets are the consequences from the action taken in our life. How many people out there are actually happy with their life? Happiness is something that we allow yourself to be where it is not something that someone else gives us. It doesn't matter how rich we are or how many stuffs we have, we can still feel unhappy. Happiness is not to be chase as it is within us waiting to be felt by us.
All of us have been working so hard everyday in life. What's the reason behind it? I believed everyone would agree with me, we wanted to show those around us that we had great job, we are rich and we had position in the society. We're pursuing brands which displays our success. A big nice expensive car, luxury home, branded handbags and clothes, latest devices and the list goes on and on... This shows that we are so busy chasing after luxurious lifestyle and we forgot to put ourselves to relax and to spend some quality time with our family. We should always bear in mind that our parents are getting older day by day and they don't have much time to wait for us. Why not we try to spend some times with them by bringing them out or even just talk to them. If you're far away from home, try calling them as a simple phone call just to ask them how have they been will definitely put a smile to their face as they realize that you care for them and you actually does think about them :)
Friends. A simple word isn't it? We are using this word everyday in our life but how many actually does appreciate the meaning of this word. Due to the busy lifestyle nowadays, a lot of us actually let friendship slipped. I believe a lot of us actually forgotten our old friends. Try recalling back who you haven't contacted a very long time and there will be a list of names. So now its the time to take action in order for not having this regret in our life!! As for me, I appreciated every single person that I knew and if I had chance to meet them, I'll definitely catch up with them even just for a mere 5 minutes.
In addition to that, try to ask yourselves, ''what's my dream?'', think about it for a few minutes. Yes, I believed most of our dreams seems unachievable and unrealistic but why don't we take action on making our dream to be reality and not just a dream ?? A lot of people out there started to forget about their dream when they're too busy working so hard in life. Alright, time to start planning now on how to fulfill our dream as always do remember that you are where you are now due to the decision you made some times ago. I always does believe dreams does come true and for me, dying without fulfilling our dream is the biggest regret in life. :)
Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.
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TITLE:New Haircut
P/S: Ignore the dirty mirror and non-makeup face. :x
Both the pictures above show the hairstyle I'm having for the past few months. Imagine I never had any haircut since December 2010!!! It's almost 10 months ago. Gosh, so you guys can imagine how horrible my hair look? My hair are terribly dried which can be set on fire anytime if I'm near to any sources of ignition. My hair color fading like hell, super ugly. >.< The only thing I like is my hair length. Haha..
Finally, last Thursday (6 October), I decided to go to my hairstylist. Cannot stand with the grass like hair anymore. My hairstylist told me it's been awhile since he see such a hair length since nowadays a lot of girls opt for shorter haircut. He said my hair ends are extremely dry and spoil. So I think I chopped off around 4-5 inches. Ouch ;( And I went for a darker hair color. My hairstylist suggested several hair color but I ended up with dark red hair which I never dye before. So, here's the outcome:
I realized red hair doesn't suits me at all :s For now, I'm really loving my hair because it's so smooth now..Haha.. And I'm waiting for another few more months to color my hair brown again.
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